Articles by Dustin Fox

TOUCH AND WHY IT IS SO IMPORTANT

Iremember when my father returned from WWII in 1946. I was three years old and my Mother took a picture of him holding me. It was the only time my father ever touched me in a positive way. He was never abusive physically, just distant emotionally. I wasn’t deprived of touch as a child because my Mother and my two aunts, army nurses, made sure that I not only received touch, but understood how important it was to feel it. In 1948, my mother put meon a stool and let me massage shampoo into the hair of the customers in her salon. Today, as a practicing massage therapist, I am blessed to have the ability to offer my techniques of healing touch. I define “appropriate touch” as touch that is given with good and selfless intent. My life’sexperiences have taught me there is nothing quite like touch for enhancing one’s health and wellbeing.

Here’s why!

There are few experiences more pleasurable than to receive the unconditional and caring touch of another. When we feel this, we instinctively want to relax. From the moment we are born, we are touched and nurtured by our parents who make us feel warm and safe. We are physically and emotionally designed for this. Without touch, we can feel physically and emotionally neglected and isolated. What are the implications of a culture that instills a “can’t touch policy”? If touch is provided only by licensed or state-approved professionals, or if it restricted only to our private and intimate relationships (where it is often sexualized). Is this primal need being fulfilled enough for each of us and for our children? Do cell phones and computers allow us to “be in touch” without really touching? How can “virtual” or fantasy” touching possibly fulfill that need? It obviously can’t. While doing massage at a fundraiser a couple of years ago, I noticed that there were three young girls who were sitting side by side texting furiously. I asked them who they were talking to and their answer was “each other”! What ever happened to just talking? Are we so “out of touch” that we don’t communicate person-to-person anymore? Are we becoming a “touchless society”? If so, how sad (and dangerous) is that? What’s this fear of touching all about? Can we get back to the common sense approach of caring through appropriate touch?

What Touch Is!

Though touch is not in itself an emotion, the sensory elements of touch do induce potent feelings. A hand on the shoulder placed with loving intent on someone who is in distress produces a welcome comfort. The feeling and energy that we have within us truly is transmitted and amplified through touch. We know intuitively whether touch is caring or threatening. Yet the interpretation and reaction to someone’s touch is often colored by prior conditioning and touch experiences. (The image of the poor dog who was beaten as a puppy and who now shrinks from touch comes to mind.) Yet, touch with the appropriate intent builds trust and closeness. It encourages communication and nurtures intimacy. Being touched in a good way can allow a person to feel worthy physically and psychologically. Touch essentially nourishes our self-esteem. As infants, it’s primarily through touch that we explore, discover, and make sense of our world. The unconditionally loving touch of our caregivers is essential to our healing and growth. Studies show that babies who receive regular massage develop faster and are in better health. When we feel loved as a result of an abundance of appropriate touch, we develop our in-built sense of safety and stability, no matter what slings and arrows get hurled at us in any given day.

TOUCH—Why It’s So Important!

How Important Is Touch? It is crucial and vital! According to J. Lionel Taylor in The Stages of Human Life (1921), “Touch is as powerful in healing the physiology as medical science. The most important sense in our body is our touch sense. It gives us our knowledge of depth thickness and form. We feel, we love and hate, we are touchy and are touched through our skin.” When a baby cries, its primary need is to be picked up, rocked, stroked and soothed, and it is our first instinct to do so. When you bang your head, your instinct is rub it and soothe it. In everyday language, we often hear: “he rubbed me the wrong way,” “he is thick-skinned; he is thin-skinned,” “they have the personal touch,” “we can’t put our finger on it,” and maybe the most telling of all we say, “please keep in touch,” even when we mean to write or to phone.

Touch in the 21st Century!

Many of us are fortunate to be in a loving intimate relationship with a partner, where touch is a given. However, for those of us not in relationship, or where our primary relationship has become non-intimate and distant, touch can be elusive. Some people will attempt to compensate for this lack by going to the hairdresser; others will resort to comfort foods, drink or contact sports; others just “get along without,” hoping the cause of their isolation will be resolved over time. How we touch today shows that as a society we are troubled and “touch-starved.” In dysfunctional relationships, touch can be used almost like a currency, given only when certain conditions are met, or given without real feeling and thus becomes unwelcomed. Healthcare providers will remain painstakingly clinical in their applications, avoiding any impression of inappropriate touch, even if it is detrimental to the desired outcome. Other caregivers are simply “burned out” and don’t want any contact. Overcrowding and stress often creates an atmosphere of “don’t touch me.” The image that comes to mind is how people will avoid all eye contact (never mind physical contact) on the crowded sidewalks of Manhattan or any other large city. What if everyone became an emotional island? What if you couldn’t physically interact with anyone in a positive way? All too often, when we encounter touch in the media, it is in the context of abuse or violence. Too many of us, especially women, have a history of receiving the wrong type of touch—the statistic is that an alarming 8 out of 10 women will receive abuse, physical and/or emotional, in their lifetime! We may go out of our way to ignore or deny the need for caring touch, and yet our bodies remain imprinted with this basic need. Are we destined to live with the consequences of reduced wellbeing, fear and suspicion, depression, insecurity, and mental illness? According to a report from the CDC, the use of antidepressants has risen over 400% since 1988. Could this be in part due to our lack of appropriate touch? We all must guard ourselves and our children from the inappropriate varieties of touch, which can make us ill, both physically and emotionally, but we must find ways to give and access the nourishing and wholesome kind of touch, which is considered by many to be the staff of life itself.

What Happens When We’re Touch Deprived?

Touch deprivation severely affects sleep necessary for the conservation and regeneration of energy. In studies on separations of young children from their mothers, sleep was always effected. The time children required to fall asleep was longer, and night waking was more frequent. In several studies, a suppressed immune response was noted following the separation of monkeys from their primate mothers, resulting in less antibody production and killer-cell activity. Upon reunion with their mothers, immune activity returned. Studies on touch deprivation among preschool children separated from their mothers noted depression and more frequent illness. Diarrhea and constipation resulted due to poor diet, also a lack of attention to personal hygiene. This is the same for adults deprived of appropriate touch. In one study, 26 adults with migraine headaches were assigned to a massage-therapy group. They received 30-minute massages twice weekly for 5 consecutive weeks. They reported less distress and pain, more days free of headaches, fewer sleep disturbances, less need for analgesics, increased serotonin levels and a decrease in cortisol levels.

How Can We “Stay in Touch”?

A sincere and warm handshake expresses how happy we are to meet someone and a hug indicates the same thing even better. Both are considered appropriate based on one’s intent. If you have a pet, doesn’t it make you feel better to touch and be touched by them? And do you observe how the animal appreciates and anticipates your touch? Studies indicate that when we touch our pets, our blood pressure and breathing become normalized. Our pets will always provide an outlet for unconditional giving and receiving of touch. Those of us who understand this basic human need want to provide it for our fellow man and there are always meaningful ways to do so. I encourage you to never miss an opportunity to express love, kindness and compassion through some manner of “appropriate touch.”

I hope this writing has provided you with greater understanding of the value of touch and helps you more closely examine the intentions behind your own use of touch. In part 2, we will delve into touch through the elements of massage.

Massage! The good touch for your wellbeing!

(Part Two)

The Meaningful Touch!

In part one we explored touch and in this article we take touch to another level. Awhile back I had a bout of kidney stones. I went to the ER and they did a CT scan and confirmed that I had a 6 mm stone. Imagine, if you will, a cockle burr the size of a pencil eraser trying to force it’s way through the eye of a very small needle. The Doctor spoke to me for few minutes and as she left my bedside she gently put her hand on my exposed foot and held that contact for a moment as she ordered the pain meds. It was through that touch that she expressed her good intentions for my well being. In that moment she did something right out of the Patch Adams movie. She genuinely cared and became emotionally involved with my plight. I felt comforted immediately and my pain level seemed to dissipate and my heart rate slowed.

Our largest organ – The Skin

How is it possible that touch can be one of most effective means to influence the structures and functions of body and mind? Does the answer lie in the skin? The skin is the largest sensory organ of the body arising in a human embryo from the same ectodermic cell layers as the nervous system. In the evolution of the senses, touch is earliest to develop. Skin statistics: In an adult male there is approximately 19 square feet of skin which contains 5 million sensory cells and, on average, represents 12 % of the total body weight. Skin is softer in summer, the pores are wider and there is greater lubrication. In winter it’s more compact and firm, the pores are closer together and body hair sheds less. A piece of skin the size of a penny has more than 3 million cells, 100-340 sweat glands, 50 nerve endings and three feet of blood vessels. Skin contains hundreds of thousands of sensory receptors, which are triggered by skin stimuli. Our heart rate and blood pressure react to what our senses pick up. Appropriate touch can prompt the brain to produce endorphins, the body’s natural pain suppressers, which are considered more powerful than morphine. This is why touch that has the genuine intent to facilitate for our wellbeing is considered by our own physiology to be the signal that prompts the brain to release endorphins. It relaxes us first emotionally because we intuitively sense the intent and then respond physically.

Where it all began – The healing touch of the ancients!

For centuries and in many early cultures, healing touch has been an accepted healing therapy. This made touch an integral part of maintaining a healthy state of wellbeing. It was seen to facilitate recovery from an ailment, calm the body and mind after a hectic day of battle, politics or sport. Also it was used as a treatment for better skin tone and muscle condition. Most importantly, these ancients held no distinction, believing that “if it felt good then it must be good”! Healing touch via massage remained common through the first millennium then gradually, particularly in Western Cultures, the emergence of “medical science” became the only legally allowed and accepted form of providing healing treatments that could or should be applied to the physiology.

Massage-What is it really?

A clinical definition of massage is “a treatment that involves rubbing or kneading of the muscles, either for medical or therapeutic purposes and/or simply as an aid to relaxation”. Another is to “give an emotional boost with a kind or uplifting treatment”. In reality, massage is far more than both of those definitions. It is, in fact, a critical part of preventative health care. When we begin to feel safe emotionally we also begin to feel safe physically. It is when we are receiving unconditional caring touch from someone who, not only understands the way our body works but also holds good intentions for our wellbeing that we have the opportunity to connect with the feeling of freedom to express our emotions. We can choose to begin releasing and depending on our own level of trust in the therapist and ourselves, to do so without fear. Fear of judgment is second only to our fear of death and in some segments of our society, it is actually more important. You may have heard of someone who stated “that I would rather be dead than seen like that”! As we relax emotionally, our brain will begin to activate the release of endorphins and seritonin. Our anxiety levels go down as our breathing becomes more regular and our circulation improves. We may drift off to sleep or actually express our feelings both emotionally and/or physically. As the therapist works with us, the levels of stress hormones that are trapped in our tissues will begin dissipate and we feel able to move more freely without discomfort. In truth, our physiology is shedding the accumulation of stress hormones that began their journey when we became emotionally upset about something. This accumulation may be due to the conditioning that we all receive as we evolve from childhood into adulthood. In truth, this accumulation of stress hormones may be a direct result of the conditioning we received and accepted as we grow up.

The benefits of Massage and why we need to make time for it!

Receiving a regular massage is well invested time. For many in our society, life is “all about the other” and not about what we can do for ourselves. We have been persuaded that to care for ourselves is self indulgent or even selfish. Common sense indicates that when we do take care of ourselves we can then take better care of others. Depending on our own accepted perspective, daily life can be full of stressful events that may or may not involve us directly but still can have a negative impact on us emotionally. Remember, what effects us emotionally also effects us physically. It is this cycle of stress accumulation that needs to be broken on a regular basis. When you go to the doctor it is your symptoms that are viewed, then the inevitable tests are ordered to confirm or deny the existence of the health issue as they see it. When we become ill the reason could be directly related to a reduction in our immune function due to an accumulation of emotionally triggered stressors. If we relax the emotions which triggered the stress and we facilitate a rebuilding of the immune function we can then begin to improve our overall health long term. Massage alone will not do that but when one feels better emotionally, they are more likely to add exercise, proper hydration, nutrition and emotionally uplifting experiences that lead them to higher levels of self respect and self worth. Saying that one doesn’t have the time simply requires a slight shift in priorities. There are 24 hours in a day. On average, we allow 8 for sleep, 4 hours for meals including prep, and 10 hours for work including the drive. Most people don’t use all of that time so that leaves 2 hours every day. That equates to 52 hours per month of weekday time. A Massage may take up to 90 minutes of that 52 hours and that doesn’t count the time you have on weekends to get a massage from someone who is open every day.

What to expect!

Before you make your first visit to a massage therapist you should, at a minimum, ensure that they meet the requirements of the state that they practice in. Although it is not required, the therapist should be willing to provide you with references if asked. Many therapists belong to professional massage organizations. Don’t be afraid to ask them how long they have been actively doing massage. Many of my clients consider it an “investment” in their preventative healthcare plan and they simply save up for it monthly. On the first visit, we should expect our Massage Therapist to gather information about us via the intake process. Normally, the more that is known about the conditions they are dealing with the better able we are able to facilitate for them. This should be followed by a clearly defined description of the type of massage process that they practice. You may wish to set some goals for what you would like to gain from your session. What is it that you wish to resolve and will the therapist work with you or just on you? It is well understood in the massage community that the primary function of the Massage Therapist is not to diagnose or “fix” our physical or emotional problems, but rather to alleviate our discomfort and facilitate a return to normalcy. The key word there is to “Facilitate”. The recipient should also be prepared to be involved in the process because without their willingness to release a positive outcome is not likely to be maintained over the long term. Understanding your motivation for wanting the massage, being able to be honest with our fears, fantasies and needs without feeling judged all go towards helping us feel able to let go and just receive. It should allow one to close the door on the rest of the world and bring focus on the needs of SELF in a safe, relaxing, non-judgmental environment. Understand that your therapist is not a mind reader so if you become uncomfortable with anything during the session, it is your responsibility to inform the therapist immediately. Doing so avoids any misinterpretation of the actions or intent of the therapist during the session. Massage is a therapy much like every other form of therapy, in that it takes more than one visit to maintain a healthy emotional and physical balance. It is, in fact, preventative health care. Do yourself a big favor and make the time to receive the blessing of massage at least once per month..

Dustin Fox is a licensed massage therapist practicing Reiki, Swedish, Vibrational Deep tissue, Reflexology and Full Body Lymph Drainage Massage Techniques. He is also a Certified Core Fear Release Facilitator and Certified Integral Breathwork Facilitator. The information in this article is not intended to diagnose or treat any perceived or actual condition of the reader. Should the reader feel that they require treatment for any condition mentioned in this article, it is advised that they contact a professional of their choice for treatment.